Roey Thorpe, executive director of Basic Rights Oregon, shared a personal story that she believes illustrates the prejudice that a gay person cannot love as truly or as deeply as a heterosexual.

The Portland, Oregon, woman said an employee who was grieving over the death of her husband asked Thorpe, “Do your people feel sad when your person dies?”

“It tells it all,” Thorpe said. “I said, ‘you saw me as a little less human and for me to realize it breaks my heart.’ “

Jenn and I were talking about the disconnect between ourselves and the 58 million people who voted for Bush, and those who voted to ban gay marriage in their states. The fact that for two days, we were so stricken and angry and bewildered shows something of our own disconnect with people like this – people who really honestly don’t connect with people who’s passions/skin color/political affiliation is so incredibly different from theirs.

I don’t see other people’s happiness or desires being a threat to me and my way of life. I still can’t, for the life of me, understand the freak-out about a couple of women getting married (well, except that they’d then have more financial power, and it would become so blindingly obvious that they could totally get along without men and… oh, nevermind). But the “real” reasons given by opponents have to do with “protecting” their own version of marriage. I’m not a fan, personally, of marriage at all, and I will never get married – but that doesn’t give me the right to try and ban marriage for everybody, just because I, personally, think it’s a waste of time and resources for myself. Marriage agrees with lots of people. Just not with me.

What kind of person would I be, to try and force my way of life on anyone else? Who would I think those sorts of people were, who wanted to get married? Would I think they were less than people for it?

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