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Oh, good! State-run news agencies! Right out of 1984! How incredibly quaint. It’s like living in Coldwar Russia. Just wait, give Bush another year, and we’ll be back to teaching 50s-style sex education and wearing — oh, wait. Wait. No, we’re just about there already. Who stole my country? I want it back.

Why does it not surprise me that when Yellow was asked on this conference call what four people we needed to widdle down our pool of thirteen Dallas people to, that one of the four people (in addition to himself), that should go… was me. He was overruled, but I think it’s interesting. So anyhow:

Yellow: Get your shit-kickers and your cowboy hat, we’re going to Dallas. Me: What the hell is this Dallas thing? Nobody said anything to me about it. Yellow: You didn’t get the e-mail from Mosh? Me: Shit, no, nobody — oh, shit, I didn’t… oh I didn’t even bother opening up my work e-mail this

1) There are weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. 2) Social Security will implode tomorrow, even if we don’t steal all that money in order to pay off our war debts. Which we are NOT going to do. 3) The gays are not real Americans, and want to sodomize your children (though how or why

…dumping half a container of instant creamer into your coffee. Oops. I’m so happy it’s Friday.

I think I’m just awestruck. I’ve spent the last six months trying to figure out what the hell I was doing wrong, why I couldn’t do the amount of workouts that I wanted, why my energy was so low, and I was getting increasingly twitchy. Gosh, could it be because I was in famine-mode, and

Dude. This is going to be a dangerous, dangerous medium for me. I’m going to have waaaaaaaay too much fun.

Figured out what I wanted to do with this feature, and I’ll try it out tonight by reading a passage from The Hours. Long distance phone calls are never a problem for me, as I’ve got phone cards (ah, having family on the West Coast), so this should be fun. So, sorta like a “here’s

Well, it was either Zoe or Jayne. You are Zoe. While most others see you as astone-cold bitch and yes.woman to the captain,you can be both a loving wife and quiteemotional – though you never let it show. Which Firefly character are you? brought to you by Quizilla

Randomly generate story ideas! A serial killer holds a slumber party in a restaurant. A courtesy clerk, a terminally-ill chef, and a racist priest practice an act for a talent show in a subway station. A zoo keeper goes swimming with a psychic-powered serial killer in the jungle. Good, clean, fun.